Two weeks ago I came across something incredibly worrying. The Marshall Lerner Condition. According to our book, it states ”That a devaluation will only improve  a countries balance of trade if the sum of the elasticities for exports and imports is greater than one in absolute terms’. After pondering about that in a class test, I though to myself ’wow that means that they could both be inelastic and improve the BOT’, but then it hit me, that’s rubbish. How could it work for two that are inelastic. So instead of sum I wrote down average. And lost marks. I questioned my teacher about it (an absolute genius) and even he was baffled. I tried a few examples with the PED at -0.6 for both, (which are greater than one in absolute terms) and predictably, they dis-improved the balance of trade. Marshall and Lerner, you pair of gimps. That fact that I’ve thought this probably means there is a logical explanation, but I dare any Economics student to try it, the results are quite shocking….

All Ireland Senior B Colleges Semi-Final. Last Saturday. Two points. Two bloody points off a schools All-Ireland. Beaten by a team from Tipperary no less. Tipperary? I didn’t even think they knew what a size 5 was down there. Seven points up at one stage, and thrown away. Their Machiavellian approach to sport is comparable to that of Edmund in King Lear, les grosse legumes (had to keep it educational)! Imagine getting to an All-Ireland final in football, it would have been a class way to end school. But hey, I still have a Dublin and Leinster medal in my pocket. Anyway, that was my crappy start to the Easter break. I probably should start with an apology for the damage I inflicted upon our belle langue, Gaelique. Even reading over it I felt like throwing up. What it did make me realise is that my Irish grammar is like that of Shakespeare, utterly non existent. So I did a bit of research. Apparently this guy, Da Animfhocail, is going around making lots of extraneous rules about when two nouns come together. Fourteen years I have studied Irish. Not once has this guy ever been taught to me. For fourteen years, I have been convinced I was rubbish at Irish. Don’t get me wrong, I probably have the best Irish teacher in the country. But if you saw one of my Aistí, you would understand. There must be a good litre of red ink used per page with corrections, lots of slight spelling changes, sheimius and úrús. I took it upon myself to actually find out when to use these grammar points, but the use of an úrú after ’na’ was never mention. Baffled so I was by things like ’fadhb na ndrugaí’ yet ’na bhpaistí’ was mícheart. Me being Mr. Logical and all that. Baffled that is until today. Fourteen years this T.G guy has escaped me, until I accidentally stumbled across him today. I’ll admit, we touched on it in the Gaeltacht last year, but like Organic Chemistry, you’re not going to get it the first time around. So fun times ahead over Easter getting to know this T.G guy…

Time is quite literally flying out the window. This time two weeks, my scrúdubhéil (imagine, prime example of the T.G, I mean, wtf is a bhéil?) will be thart. Three weeks et mon francais oral sera fini. Eight weeks and I graduate. Imagine, no more school? Ten weeks, English Paper 1 will be completed. Twelve weeks and I’ll be re-capping on my last Economics paper. Not. I shall be getting rather merry with a few friends!
It really does seem like only yesterday I was going in to help the incoming first years acclimatise to secondary school life, and the day before that, as if I were a diminutive first year with my oversized bag. Funny how the bag condition has reappeared in sixth year. My current one could probably hold a decent sized first year. Discontent with getting a bottom locker this year, all my books remain in the bag. Couple that with a few days without shaving, and my friends claim I could pass as a suicide bomber, a disguise to go with my explosive personality. Ok, awful pun I know, but sixth year really does drain all humour from you.

As for the whole study situation, it’s going ok I guess. I haven’t really started killing myself just yet. We’ve had great weather of late. Great weather for study that is. I’ve been getting the Exam Brief supplements in the Irish Independent of late, and while I admit their useful, all I have managed to read so far is the student profiles. One girl claimed that recording all of the Chemistry definitions onto her iPod helped her remember them all on the day. So me being me, I copied her style for Chem. Biology and Economics too. And sure hey, if they are going to work for those, I may as well try it for my oral work. I’m not sure how successful it has been so far hearing myself ream off notes about A l’étranger, but it can only help! One thing I’ve noticed from doing masses of exam papers in Maths is that the exam is getting bloody harder each year. Algebra for example. Take any of the questions from the past three years. Easy? I shall think not! Now have a look at 1998 Q2. 5 minutes it took me to do the entire question and get the 50 marks. So to all of you who claim the Leaving Cert is getting easier and think ‘oh how hard it was back in the day,’ f!@# you! Your A1 in 1998 wouldn’t get you a C3 now!

Now that the hype of the mocks is dead and buried, it’s time for post mortems. English my best result? It’s probably evident from reading my blogs that it’s not my thing. Still, 78 left me over the moon. If I got a B2 in the real thing, I would be rather satisfied! My B3 in French is another thing I laughed at when I saw the result. Albeit a four year old mute could answer the comprehensions and get full marks, I was still pleased. Again, a subject I expect to see a C beside in August. As for the other four. I know in my heart and soul I am capable of getting A1’s in Chemistry, Economics, Biology and Maths, but a serious amount of work needs to be done. A serious amount of work = time, and well time, it’s something we’re all running out of. I got 460 in the mocks. I set that exact aim last October and thankfully I reached it. Looking around and seeing some people not even reaching triple digits is worrying, I have a friend who improved by 250 points from his mocks, albeit he 90 in them. But I really have to break 500. It’s not like I’ve a choice. Actuary was 530 in UCD last year and 485 in DCU. With applications up by 10%, it’s going to rise. Being honest, I’m not sure if I would be happy doing Primary Education or Economics and Finance in NUIM. It’s not that I think they are below me, but I love a challenge. I like to think of myself as a bit of a workhorse, and frankly, those courses are quite laid back. So how fitting, I’ve to work my socks off to work my socks off for the next four years, or I can take it easy, and take the next four years easy! Some reward eh?
Anyway, I shall wrap up, I’ve a date with this Tuiseal Guinideach guy, I’d hate to be late!
Enjoy your Easter, well except for those in sixth year, as that would be awful advice! As a learned man once told me,
‘Avoid present pleasures for future happiness’
Bon(ne) chance